John is our Senior Copywriter and is going through the fun and stress-free process of buying his first home. Join him here in this monthly post about home living, moving house and kitting out your first home. First up, some thoughts and tips about clothes moths. He does not want them to move house with him (unless they contribute to the mortgage and are happy to receive deliveries while he's at work).
On this fine day I have decided to pay tribute to the humble clothes moth. Having studied it for many years I must finally concede my respect for what has become my fiercest adversary.
I can spot a clothes moth from 7 metres, even when it's camouflaged in a carpet of the same colour. That's how refined my senses have become when dealing with these niggling critters.
Mark my words, friends. If we're not careful, this innocuous creature will evolve into a race of super-vermin capable of chewing through brick, metal, rock, and Yorkies that have been in the fridge for ages.
Let me describe my carpets to you.
Imagine you had a small garden that contained 5 square metres of grass. Now imagine you had 17 cows living there. Have a think about what your lawn might look like. That's how bare my carpets are.
For years they have been feasting upon the fineries of my home. Every time I vacuum, the bald patches reveal themselves a little more. May the gods have mercy on your soul should you be the kind of person who loathes housework and only vacuums once a year.
Admittedly I only vacuum once a year. But really, is that the answer? That's what they want me to do. I would have to spend every waking moment ushering them into my vacuum cleaner, which would negate my entire existence. An endless purgatory masterminded by tiny, mindless brutes.
And the vacuum cleaner doesn't even get them all! The ones who survive end up in a vessel filled with cloth and dust and everything their hearts desire. It's like hurling a toddler into a gargantuan silo of candy floss.
Anyway, I suppose I'm exaggerating a little. Here's what you can do to deal with the clothes moth.
I'm moving house in August and my new place comes complete with laminate flooring in every room. Any clothes moths who make the move with me will face a barren future indeed. It's a personal preference I suppose, but I find laminate or wood flooring quite lovely and shiny and easy to keep clean. Plus it's perfect if, like me, you have dust allergies.
2. Replace your wardrobe with chain mail and suits of armour
The ravenous clothes moth is yet to reach an evolutionary state where it's capable of consuming metal. You just need to cope with all the peculiar looks that literally everyone will give you.
If you're not familiar with these vacuum bags, then now's the time to get on board. Fill them with items you don't use very often – winter coats, ski jackets, fancy woollen jumpers, spare duvets etc – and then attach a vacuum nozzle to the connector. When it sucks all the air out, not only does it shrink the contents to a fraction of the size for easy storage, but it also stops any moths in their tracks.
Clothes moths hate lavender. Why do you think your nan's flat smells like a vast Dutch greenhouse full of lavender plants? Because she's wiser than you and won her battle with clothes moths decades ago.
Turn their primitive desires against them and capture them in these sticky traps. They give off pheromones that attract the moths, who find themselves stuck to the cardboard. Place them in dark corners and spots that are difficult to reach with your vacuum cleaner.
There's a whole armoury of sprays you can use to stop them breeding. Again, dark corners are where they are most effective – just remember to read the instructions as some sprays require a bit of ventilation once applied.
7. Break out the vacuum
One of my favourite sayings is: “Do as I say, not as I do.” Regular vacuuming will work wonders (so I'm told).
Follow these tips and you'll soon be on top of the problem. But remember, if you find yourself with a pest that you can't handle, our pest controllers can definitely help you out.
The post Man vs Moth – 7 tips for dealing with the humble clothes moth
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